The mysterious chibi hater!
by CanonDragon
Summary: For some odd reason(MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY) Master hand has made chibi versions of the smashers! The night before they are released into stores, they all suddenly go missing! Who is the thief? Why would they want to steal such...such... CUTE chibi's! R&R ask who you want involved!
1. The Mysterious chibi hater! Chapter 0

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything in this story but the story itself. Let them roam free._

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_Tap Tap Tap Tap Tap Tap_

Small footsteps, barely audible, crept down the dark halls. The huge, white double doors opened without a sound. There would be left no trace, not a hand print, footprint, or a single strand of hair would be found.

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The room was so brightly lit that the smashers had to cover their eyes.

"Crazy hand, turn the brightness down, your blinding me, and I don't even have eyes."

The giant floating hand twitched and they could see again.

"Well then," Master hand cleared his nonexistent throat,"I've come with great news! We will be having a new item sold in the gift shop-"

"**IT'S JUST SO CUUUTE, I WANT TO EAT IT. OMNOMNOM- AW! I DON'T HAVE A** **MOUTH!**"

"As you can see, we-"

"**JIGGLYPUFF! GIVE ME YOUR MARKER, I WANT TO DRAW A MOUTH. DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC~**"

"Chibiswillsoonbeavailableinthestore. That is all." The two hands stormed out of the room, or maybe they were running. I couldn't tell.

"Ooh!" Peach squealed,"I wonder what i'll look like, I wonder how big my eyes will be. Will I be in the same dress? What will chibi _Mario_ look like..."

"Did they get my hair right?" This time it was Marth.

"Oh I don't know _princess_. Why don't you ask?"

"Oh shut up Ike! Chibis are NOT girly!"

"Yeah, just keep on saying that. That baby dolls with oversized heads and exaggerated eyes aren't cute."

"Seriously stop! I am not a girl!"

"You wear makeup like a girl, dress like a girl, talk like a stupid girl, swing like a girl, and you hit like a girl."

"Something wrong with being a girl bub?" Samus's glare shot at Ike like arrows, and his arm started bleeding.

"Uh, no ma'am. N-nothing wrong with girls, girls are cool-pleasedonthurtme."

"I thought so." Her deadly eyes narrowed.

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R&R! Comment what you want the Point of View to be(POV or something like that)

No seriously. I'm watching this thing like a hawk. This is only a sample of what I can do.

More chapters to come! This is just an intro! Also this is my extremely simplified humor form of writing. Ask for more details if you want.


	2. Chapter 1: Cooking in Popstar Sucks

_Okay.. I mustn't expecting reviews but okay..._

_Tell me if you want it more or less detailed._

_INSIDE MY LIFE:_

_Just discovered that mixing apple cider and hot chocolate in a certain way tastes like heaven._

_Please, ask who you want the main character to be! Otherwise I'm doing the other kind of plot, like this. I made sure to translate the complex and well-mannered thoughts of meta knight into a simple, easy form._

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_Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story but the plot itself X.X_

_NOW BACK TO STORY!_

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I hated it. How in the _world_ did they manage to get a model of me? I haven't even taken my mask off since I came to SSBB. Even if I did, I made sure it was in private; perhaps like I do when I bathe. But there was a law against that, I'm sure of it. But the main problem was the tiny; little blueberry doll with white eyes in my hands.

And this... chibi was going out into the public. I can't have that. Nobody would ever look at the fearsome face I wore serious again. If i were to stop this, I had to do it quickly. The store would open in mere days, and that gave me so little time to manage. But then again, I had my trusty cape and sword. Wait, my cape! I can transport the goods into my cape, though, I wouldn't be using my final smash anytime soon then. Shame to give up such a beautiful move, but I can't just let my face displayed to the public.

But then the door opened behind me, and I shoved the little chibi back into the gift box. Then put that in my cape.

"Aren't you coming down for dinner?"

"I shall be there soon."

Yoshi lifted a nonexistent eyebrow and shut the door.

"Creep" Then footsteps slowly slipped from existence.

I sighed and let my shoulders go slack. I would think later, now is time for dinner. I would need the energy for upcoming battles.

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Wario glared at me for the wait, that hog. I stood in my chair. This high counter never did a guy any good, especially with all the... short people here.

They eyed me carefully until I had landed in my seat, and the moment I got in my chair a frenzy broke out. I grabbed the sweet stuff, the orange chicken and noodles; BBQ chicken and sweet n' spicy sauce. I didn't bring chopsticks tonight, those are too hard to eat with. By the time I was full there was only a bit of sweet n' spicy sauce dripping on the inside of my mask. Why the waste, the food was delicious.

I never tasted something as nice as the food here ever since I came to planet Popstar. Kawasaki was a horrible cook, I'm sure I was better than him. Though one time I heard Sword and Blade complaining about my cooking. Nah, they were probably talking about Kawasaki. I still wonder how he landed royal chef two times, let alone once. Still, I'd never get tired of this cooking.

"You pumped about the new chibis?"

"Yeah I am!" Lucas fist-pumped the air at Toon Links floating question. It spun around until it landed on me.

"So... umm... uhh... how about you?"

"I am interested in this newest addition to our merchandise."

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't you say so?"

"I did 'say so'"

"No, you said that weird pile of wack, you make my head hurt."

I turned away.

"Wait! I didn't mean to offend you! I just wanted to ask all the villans if they thought the rumor was true!"

"What rumor?"

"That they're making the villains chibi."

All the villans will be chibi? Bless me, then I will have to steal the villains' chibis too. Otherwise It would look mighty suspicious.

"I don't think that will happen."

"You're right, I mean, how the heck are they going to make _you_ chibi?"

He was right. I was already chibi. I'll play along, since this is a rumor, I can keep it a rumor.

"Indeed, it is impossible."

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CLIFFHANGER- MUAHAHAHAHAHA.

*ahem* sorry. I'm just ending the chapter here. If I make them all so short and easy I wont have a problem this weekend typing when my sisters are over, staring across the room at my laptop. So I'm typing it early and posting a chapter every day. So many short stories! If you're lucky and review, I'll post another one today!


	3. Chapter 2: Stupid boxes!

_I've made it so Roy (and maybe some others) are now in the story. I now present to you, the simplified meta knight thoughts! No seriously, check out this guys vocabulary. I made it great for light readers._

_IN MY LIFE:_

_Sorry for the delay, my family just came over, and are now setting up the tree. Skipping out on building the tree, I write this story, but halfway in I decorated the house for the first time. I have discovered I love decorating._

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_Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story but the plot! Let them be free!_

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Tonight they were shipping the chibis over. If he helped out, he would know exactly which was which. The names were labeled on each of the crates. A large shipment of crates sat at the front of the storage facility next to the mansion. You wouldn't spot it because Olimar grew his garden on it. Clever little guy, I still cant figure out how he managed to grow flowers on the windows.

I jumped out from a windowsill and landed on the ground far below. Ike, Ganondorf, and Roy were starting to carry the crates inside.

"Care to help?" Ike meant it as a joke, but I took it quite seriously.

"Actually, I do." That took him by surprize.

"But you're too sho-" now it was my turn to be surprized. He actually used his head. "okay, you can help."

I don't know what they were fussing over, the crates were lightweight to me. I was in luck, they made me carry it to the spots around the facility, while they just brought it to the entrance. Roy carried a crate surprisingly heavy.

"Do you need help with that?"

"No thank you, I have it all under control."

He was about to pass it to me when his sweaty grip( the crates were wet, don't ask how I figured it out) was lost and it slammed to the ground. Then he tried to pick it up again.

"AYIEEE!" I flinched as the box fell on his foot with a sickening crack. Roy hopped on one foot but then picked up the crate again. Then he dropped it again. "Ha! You didn't get me this time." He did it again, thankfully missing again. I took it away from him.

"Hey! I was gonna do that!" No comment.

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I heaved the last chibi crate into its respectful spot. I knew exactly where the villains crates were all stored. Tonight I would come in and put the crates into his dimensional cape. I would just have to see when it would be the best time to-

"Man that looks like it hurts, you okay?"

"Yeah, just a little sore."

"Well, okay then..."

"At least we got the crates completed." This mood would make them feel cautious, it wouldn't do.

"Oh shut up, I've had stubbed toes worse than that." Ah yes, forgot about Ganondorf, the all but sympathetic one. I narrow my eyes at him, but with the mask it only looked like a stare or even a glare.

Roy limped off to the mansion and we strode behind him. The distraction was great I guess, everyone would be worried about him. I may be able to just pull this off and save my identity.

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Peaches eyes widened and her blue eyes shot to the limping Roy. "Oh Roy! You poor thing! What happened?!" She skid to the swordsmans side and Mario glared at him with daggers. "Oh you poor, poor thing! Mario! Mario please, would you see if anything is broken. Poor little Roy-roy! Don't worry you'll be okay!"(A/N: So much punctuation! I always imagined Peach like this. My worst nightmare. D:)

A walk to the infirmary and a checkup later.

"He has-a broken big toe, we will have to replace the foot with metal!" A little far for revenge.

"That cannot be! Give me the X-ray." Roy didn't look so calm anymore.

"Oh you poor little thing!" Wrong move, Mario. Made her only care more. Zelda stepped into the room; Link trailed behind her.

"Let me have a look."

"But-a you are not-a a doctor."

"No, but I know more than you, now be a dear and hand me the pictures."Harsh."You won't be needing any surgery for this," this struck me as an interesting discovery. Note to self, go to Zelda, not 'Dr.'Mario,"Just a cast, but since there isn't one yet just a flat shoe will do." She walked out of the room. I heard muttering about Link owing her a favor and Mario being an idiot.

They totally ditched Mario then on, Roy didn't even need crutches. This surprised me, as if I were him I would have a full leg cast and a wheelchair. But that may just be because of my atonomy. Marth Stuck to him like glue, and Ike hung around like string. Link always stayed close and cheered him up.

"Glad you're okay! I can't believe Mario would put metal in your foot just to get back at you for Peach feeling sorry for you. Totally unexpected! I know what will cheer everyone up! There's gonna a party in the announcement/cafeteria room. Since it's so big its the perfect place." I saw everyone's eyes light up like fire. Wait, a party? Oh no, people will suspect me if I don't go. But if I go I'll be tired at dawn. But if I do nobody will suspect me. But most of all, why didn't I know of this?

I was surprised. I must have zoned out because we were already walking towards the door to the party. I couldn't resist the lollipops, I've never had those flavors before, I mean, it was cherry. How could I resist? The large room looked more like a huge, round ballroom. It was amazing how they could add to the already gold and marble walls and windows. Streamers fell all over the wall in sparkly patters. On one side it was pink, I'm guessing Princess Peach.

Kirby was burping in the punch bowl, Yoshi was next to a suspiciously large egg, and Sonic was nowhere to be seen. Toon Link was in a dog pile with on Lucas and Ness. I saw King Dedede look at the pile with a devious look in his eye. A madly blushing Samus was holding her gun at Snakes grinning face, but I decided to turn my eyes away before anything else happened. Ike, Marth, Roy, Link, and Mr. Game and Watch huddled around a video game of some kind. I could tell it was a video game of some sort because of the music it was giving. Not that there wasn't any music here already but you get the point.

Crazy hand was playing paddy cakes with the wall and tangling himself in the curtains. Wario was picking his nose next to Bowser, ignoring Bowsers ranting about how cannons should have smoke effects. Lucario was talking with all the other Pokémon, with Red standing by looking at the two... uncaptured... wild Pokémon. Oh no. Nevermind that, but it seemed everyone was caught up with their own business. Mario was overprotective over Peach now. He was risking his life standing in a group of dangerous princesses.

_Somehow _I got into a conversation over spaceships with Fox, Falco, and Wolf. The moment the conversation ended I saw my chance. He decided to 'go to bed' since it was getting late.

"Why the rush? Too excited for the chibis?" Marth had a keen eye.

"I simply need the sleep."

"Okay, but you can always join us later."

And with that I slipped out of the room, into the concealing darkness.

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_Sorry, I did say I had my stepsiblings over. Just be glad we skipped out on bingo tonight and my mom has a friend from California or something visiting, so my parents are busy. Also they're reading right now, and I myself am getting tierd. I just want to wrap this up and close my burning eyes. Stupid weather, making my eyes burn and my nose stuffed._

_But writing stories these short once a day or twice a day makes everything really easy for me. Please ask if you want more detail. _

_Also, funny thing. I put in the toe thing from something that happened to me. When I was 8 or 9 I tried to lift a huge bench so we could sit down and make cookies. I dropped it four times. The first time it did nothing, the second landed on my toe, and the third missed and I laughed like a maniac, and then the forth missed too, maybe the fith drop also missed. Then someone helped me pick it up._

_Two weeks later of weird limping it seemed my toe was not simply bruised. I could not fit my tiny feet into my size 13 shoes anymore and had to wear slippers on one foot. My mom took me to a doctor and we got a X-ray. I had one broken big toe, almost a clean cut, or smash I could say. They said they would have to do surgery and put metal in my foot so it would grow right, but my mom didn't agree with that. I was shocked and worried so we went to a professional to look at my purple, blue, and black swollen toe. The bald man or the guy with pale gray hair (I don't remember what he looked like) said that we should just wear a flat shoe. I was kinda sad, I wanted crutches, not to just walk around more on a flat shoe instead of a normal shoe. I was surprised that was all. I wore it for 4 months and never saw those slippers again._

_Also funny thing, I did the whole hop on one leg thing! XD But no crying O.o_

_Cya later_

_R&R if you're bored or want to talk to me about the story_

_Goodnight!_


	4. Chapter 3:Time for some serious business

**_Oh my goodness! I got so busy in life that I-_**

**_I'm not making excuses. I have a life to live, and i'm sorry that I was busy. I have been typing on my I Pod and emailing it to myself but really..._**

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**_Note: I'm making this story a little bit more serious, and less OOC_**

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**_Disclaimer: I do not own anything IN this story. Am I clear._**

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Darkness washed over me like a veil. I glided noiselessly down hallways, doors, twists and turns. At last I was outside, and the harmony of the night rang in my ears. The storage facility was merely a half mile away. But you never knew where eyes were, mechanical or not. So instead, I dashed through the woods and came out in a dimly lit clearing behind the facility.

Huge vine covered brick walls loomed over me. The windows were near the top, to prevent unwanted pests from getting into the food power-ups. I leaned forward, balancing all of my weight and dashed towards the wall. Just as I was about to run into it in a embarrassing feat I jumped off of it, into the air. I knew something that the other smashers didn't that I could do with my selected moves of choice. I glided downwards, then shot back up again; right onto the windowsill. I never dare try that in brawl, I would lose that move by vote. After all, if anyone was more powerful than the other, that wouldn't be a fair fight. Even I agree on having a fair fight, otherwise that just isn't right.(**_A/N: Lol! I rhymed!_**)

Anyways, There was a vine on the window, but instead of cutting it I merely crawled behind it. Then I slid the window open in one swift motion. I didn't dare leave it wide open, just in case someone was watching. I forced open my wings and glided down, softly touching the cold, concrete floor. Now it would be harder. Security had been set up since people kept on trying to get in for the food and weapons. Mainly food, for some reason. We had to go weeks without food power-ups in battle. I couldn't collect candy anymore in battles either. Taking candy from the meals I received was too suspicious. I knew that the villians' chibis had been placed in a low security area. I supposed a heroes chibi was more important. I hated being considered a villian, had I ever really done something wrong. Well there was that one time I was possessed in Kirby's epic yarn, but I blame the yarn for taking hold of me with its magic.

Anyhow, now the crates were in visible sight. There were only lasers around the crates. No cameras, perfect. Lady luck must be on good terms with me then. I crawled under the lasers as flat as I could go. But suddenly, my perfectly round figure grazed the side of a lazer. The alarm was about to go off, but I was quicker. In a second flat the lasers all turned off. My sword was slid in the crack of the power box. Since I didn't stab it, like Toon Link or Kirby nobody would notice at first. No time to lose now. I simply took a smash ball from the previous battle(do I ever really need them?) and cracked it open. Emotions swept through me feverishly, but I felt nothing. My cape swept out before me and pitch blackness enveloped the boxes. I now stood in an garage of empty boxes, there were no fears for my identity, no worries. They were all gone now, and I could now relax.

Actually, no, I still had to get out of the building before that shard of dawn broke my dark cover. I could now see the window, a dark blue glow cast from it. But that wasn't moonlight, that was the coming sun. Air whizzed past me as I dashed by rows and rows of doors and I barely met the wall in a painful hug. Instead, I ran up its face and out he window. I knew it shut when a slam echoed behind me.

Once again would I glide down dark halls, through doors, twists and turns. But at last I reached my bedroom door, which stood welcoming in my visor. The harmony of dawn continued on, and without notice I slipped into my room and snuggled up in bed.

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I'm in my own bed as I type this. Sleep seems so welcoming right now. I'll upload my next chapter in less than a week this time. Don't worry, the humor hasn't come yet.


	5. Chapter 4- I think of pancakes

Okay! I've gotten my chips and dip and ready to type! I also have strawberry jello- I mean- I am going to try to include all of the characters. Anyways, the funny part comes in either the next chapter or the next next chapter! I'm going to do 1,000 words now, because everyone seems to like the plot. And this time I actually have a plot!

The only reason why there weren't many characters in the previous chapters was because MK was trying to stray away from the others. Now that that's over I can type up my favorite scenes!

Also I've decided I'll keep it translated and simplified. I think it sounds better that way.

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Disclaimer! I don't own anything in this story but the plot, oh but I do own the recipe to the smoothies!

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Since I got rid of those irritable chibi dolls I've had sweet dreams. Last night felt like it never happened, and a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I rose out of bed and into the kitchen without worries. It was when I opened the door when-

"Ahh!" Lucas dove behind a shelf, wait- no. Was that a pile of pancakes? I looked around the room and sweatdropped. A mountain of pancakes stood in the middle of the room. For some reason it felt like it was still growing. I slowly walked around it and havoc broke out. Kirby was Cook Kirby and was baking pancakes like he'd been doing it his whole life. Lucas and Ness were in a fort made of pancakes. And worst of all wasn't that, no not even close. An eating contest was being held at the largest table.

It was like someone took a lawnmower and took off the safety cover. Chunks of food were flying everwhere and I felt a grossly huge clump smack against my mask and slide to the floor. Heroes and their rivals sat across from one other, pigging out and not bothering to chew with their mouth closed. How ill-mannered they were!

The loudest chompers were Fox and Wolf, who were glaring at each other and using everything but their forks and knives to eat. At least Ganondorf and Link used forks and knives. They ate like wild animals. Slobber oozed out and they would never notice they were out of syrup. Wario was shoving pancakes into Luigi's mouth, who looked ready to explode. All of the girls left the room though, except for one annoying fairy.

"HEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOK..."

A swordsman I could only name by the mismatched shoes on their feet was barfing into the waste bin.

"What!" Roy croaked.

A loud disgusting burp rang out through the huge room. I had enough of observing.

"What are you DOING!" Galaxia was suddenly in my hand. One powerful sword beam sliced the nearest table in half. Nobody paid attention but the two boys hiding the pancake fort;and Olimar who sat in a chair at that very table. A cloud of little Pikmin souls floated away. But the most unexpected hero came to my rescue.

**"OH JOLLY O' MOLLY ME HEEYEEAH. WE HAVE GOTS SOME GOODIE LOODEE PAN CAKES, DUN WEE MUNKKIN!"**

Everyone screamed.

Plates were smashed, pancakes were even more mashed, and heads were clashed. Navi even stopped talking. Kirby ran out of ingredients. Toon Link ran into the little pancake fort; which fell over. Snake came out of his box, Yoshi turned into an egg, I fell over, Ganondorf choked on his pancakes, and Sonic ran in slow motion. Before I could see anything else the room went black. Then it was silent.

Soon the lights flickered back on and there was just a sea of pancakes. A girly bundle of screams came out when some late sleepers opened the doors and were buried with us.

Crazy Hand cleared his throat. **"I'M SURE Y'ALL HUNGARIAN BY NOW SO I MADE YOU ALL SOME PANCAKES! X THREE! EL OH EL."**

Peach, who stood in the doorway screamed in horror. Her lovely painful pans were bundled up into pyramids(A/N: This is Crazy Hand we're talking about!) and served on a trash can lid. And then there was laughing or crying that shook the room. Crazy hand started crying and blew his nonexistent nose into Falco. Though for me and a few other onlookers there was an entirely different feeling. We who had begun swimming to the exit became enveloped in disgusting gas.

"HEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTEN..."-Was the last thing I heard before I blacked out.

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I had a strange dream about a fairy following me. It was during an Zombie outbreak, and I ended up getting killed by the same fairy by falling off a cliff.

"...HEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTENHEYLOOKLISTEN..."

I stared directly at Navi, who was flying directly in front of my mask.

"...What?"

"Sorry." I expected something else.

With a quick glance to the ground I found myself in an infirmary bed.

"What I meant to say was 'what happened?''

A green faced Lucario sat in the bed across the room a bed away from a pale Sheik.

_"Navi Happened."_

"May I ask what will happen too?" I cringed at the thought of entering that dreaded room again.

_"The day will continue as usual."_

"..."

burst into the room.

"You all were brain-dead! It's-a a miracle!"

_"We were never brain-dead."_

"I-a knew that!" Now I highly doubt his claims as a doctor. I've got to get out of here fast. My hand touched the doors' handle, but Mario's mouth was faster.

"Not-a so fast! I-a must see if you really aren't-a all still brain-dead." So all of us unlucky victim's of Navi booked it.

* * *

Back in the hallway the doors were still clogged in pancakes. Though there was a green hole in the pile of pancakes, by Navi no doubt.

"How about we go to the gameroom!" Wow, I guessed I never noticed Popo and Nana there.

"Great idea!" Shiek said in his/her best boy voice.

"Link still hasn't figured it out yet?" I had to ask.

"Yeah man."

But our 'calm' conversation came to an end just as fast as it started. For the speakers implanted into the light fixtures had turned on, full blast obviously. "All Smashers are to report to the OTHER announcement room. The dining and meet room has been full of unrecognizable substance. No Smashers are permitted to enter the room until further notice." Again?

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Ask for more details if you want! I guess I really didn't describe the backgrounds well.

Vote for who you want the POV to be. Right now, the one I want most for a new POV to be is Kirby, because all he can say is "Poyo!". And that my dear friends, makes me laugh at the thought!

Funny chapter up next! Will update today or tomorrow, I hate cliffhangers! Plus thinking about it makes me laugh inside.

Also after the POV changes even more interactions with other characters will come!

-Canondragon


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